I’m not a negative person

We need positivity to achieve happiness. I don’t write anything revolutionary with that.

On this post, I featured the Instagram picture I published to announce this blog. The caption of this picture said:

Launching my blog right now! I know I’ll be judged for what I’ll write here, but you know what? I don’t give a damn shit!

One of my follower said “it was very defensive and negative“. I’m neither a defensive nor a negative person – at least not anymore. But there is something important to have in mind: context. Let’s have a look of mine.

I was born in France, almost 29 years ago. I always lived in France since, mainly in the North-East. So basically, I’m “French”.

But yesterday, I wrote that I have plans to leave France, “because I have no happy future here“. There’s many reasons why being happy in France is virtually impossible for me, but one of them is that French people are very judge. Like, very. As in “you have no idea how French people are judgy”.

The French society is very conformist. You can be you as long as you don’t stand out of the crowd. So basically, you can never be you – or you’ll be seen as a fringe, a dropout, a weirdo, pick what you prefer.

As many French, I’ve been raised in a quite conformist family – in a even more conformist place. But considering who I am, French conformism is anything but the way of life good for me to be happy.

Since the turn I had in my life a few weeks ago, I don’t care anymore to what strangers or people who don’t respect me think about me (to be honest, it started long before this turn but it’s another story). But it’s still “fresh”, and this is a very important subject I want to talk about.

More, as I’m stuck in France for (at least) one more year, I’ll still be surrounded by all these judgy people for quite some time.

Don’t think I care about what they think of me. I don’t. Like, at all. But being surrounded by that much judgy people, sometime it’s just tiresome. And you have to stand for yourself a bit louder.

Being yourself is never easy, especially if you’re very different. But I have the feeling that it’s especially hard in France.

Being happy should be a top priority in life. And if you have to make a bold move to follow this path, just do it. No one else will do it for you – at least, no one really did that for me since I was born.

Stand for yourself–no matter what

Last Friday I started this blog. On my Instagram feed, I published this (look at the caption):

Opening yourself to the world is somehow risky, as you will likely have to deal with haters–and similar kind of despicable people. You’ll be judged, more or less depending of your country (it’s “more” in France for instance…). But you know what? You shouldn’t care. I don’t. Not anymore.

Being oneself, being true to yourself, is probably the most important thing you can do ever. Some people will judge you–but should it prevent you to be the person you really are?

Being “different”, whatever this “different” means, is hard. I won’t deny that. You have to fight conformism all the time. But this difference is what makes you stand out of the crowd. This is maybe the most important thing about yourself. So don’t let other people put you down because they are jealous, or because they don’t understand who you are or what you try to do. Kick them out of your backyard if they are too close, but if they are far enough, let them spread their hate. There is nothing you can do to stop them, so you should focus, act on yourself and ignore them (I don’t pretend it’s easy though).

Do what you love, be yourself, and don’t give a shit to haters and judgy people. You don’t need negativity, but positivity to be happy. I didn’t run a poll on that, but I’m pretty sure every happy person in the world will agree with that!

You can follow me on Instagram at @simardcasanova.

Finally, a place where I can say “I”

For a very long time I’ve searched for a place like this blog, a place where I could be myself without restraints.

Life is a show; we’re all on a huge stage, spending our time to pretend we are not the person we really are. This is both insane and perfectly logical. Insane, because we lie to ourselves all the time. Perfectly logical, because it’s likely that this whole hypocrite thing is the product of our biological evolution–as living things.

So who am I? I mean, for real. Well, it’s hard to say. Not that I’m confused about myself–I used to be, though. But I am so many things… Where should I start?

Marketing experts say that if you want to launch a blog, or a “product”, you need to focus on one single aspect. You can’t chase all in the same time. But you know what? This blog is not a product; it bears my name. This blog, for the first time in my life, I want it to be me. In all my complexity, my weirdness and everything.

I hope I’ll be read. I mean, let’s be honest: if I write publicly it’s because I want to be read. But mostly, I just want to write and to be myself.

Many of my friends, many of the people I meet, my therapist too, they all say I’m an amazing person. To be honest, I had a hard time before I started to believe that too; I’ve not been raised in a place where this is the kind of thing you say nor you think. But now I believe them. I think they’re right. So why would I prevent myself to write about the stuff I find interesting and important? Others are doing that all the time, so why not me? In some ways, launching this blog is an act of self-respect–and self-love.

My name is Olivier, and you just read the first of (I hope so) a long series of posts. Welcome to my life!